When I first heard of Orgasmic Audio, I started imagining all sorts of possibilities that might be contained within. The title brings to mind the time I got laid at a music festival, the bow-chicka-wow of 1970s porno funk, and the ASMR tingles I get from sweet nothings whispered into my ear. As modern masturbators, we’ve grown used to 4K ultra-HD visuals, sometimes forgetting our other sensual senses. This next joint promises to light up your brain and embiggen your throbbing member through your auditory canal, so it seemed like a good place to test out my new headphones and handheld vagina simulator.
OrgasmicAudio.com calls itself “Probably the most interactive erotic audio platform that you can experience,” which is a hell of a brag for such a new website. Then again, the whole focus here is on a very underserved niche in 2024, so they might be on to something. They’ve got a growing catalog of audio porn, so let’s tune in and get turned on.
Turning Soundwaves into Boners
I spend the average day poking around on websites that greet me with the most explicit, cum-drenched imagery right from jump. OrgasmicAudio looks downright wholesome in comparison. If I couldn’t read, I’d probably assume the whole thing was SFW. The design ain’t overly flashy but it feels clean and professional, with a nice logo that’d work easily as well for a streaming music service or shop selling hi-fi audio components.
It’s a text-based presentation, so you won’t notice how filthy it is until you start reading the words. One of the first things I noticed was the nice range of kinky scenarios and sexy storylines they’re exploring. You can make a lot of reasonable assumptions from titles like Bikini Titfuck, Beach Voyeur and Edging Queen. I see some of the same niches that are popular on the video tubes, like step-family roleplaying (Taboo Blowjob and Stepmum Helps You Out), 18+ teens (Schoolgirl Handjob in the Bus and Slutty Schoolgirl), and femdom (Obey Your Mistress).
OrgasmicAudio.com is a paysite, so you’ll have to buy a ticket if you want the full show, but they do offer ample free previews. There’s a 96-second Introduction clip going over the basics of the site and warning you not to drive while getting all hard and drippy, as well as short previews of the paid audio stories. All the previews I checked out were over 6 minutes long, constituting larger chunks of the full versions than you normally get with premium video previews.
This is a good point to bring up Christina, the chick who runs Orgasmic Audio. I didn’t realize this until I started listening, but the whole site is a solo show. Christina writes and narrates all the content here, taking in feedback and suggestions from her listeners. I’m a big fan of amateur porn sites run by one person, because they tend to be labors of love; you can usually expect higher-quality, more personal content from someone who’s a legit fan of the genre.
Christina’s got a sexy voice, too, which goes a long way in making Orgasmic Audio so orgasmic. She’s breathy, giggly and articulate, and man, what a filthy mouth! Dirty talk can be hit or miss, but you can tell she’s got a big, bouncy set of brain cells, and a pretty damn good idea how to get her fans all hot and bothered.
Filthy Talk on the Regular
The six-minute samples are nice, but you know how samples work. They’re meant to lure you toward the full, paid version. If you’re at Costco, you might end up buying a whole bag of those baked cheese snacks the nice lady handed you. At OrgasmicAudio, you might end up buying a whole stash of those dirty fantasies the nice lady spoke to you. I’ve got to have closure on my erotic stories, and by closure, I mean full, messy completion.
Memberships are a lot cheaper than your average premium porn video site. I charge $30 a month for PornDudeCasting, which you’ll probably recognize as the industry standard. OrgasmicAudio.com is charging just under a tenner for a recurring membership with unlimited access. The non-recurring membership is $16.90, and while I usually recommend just setting a reminder on your phone to reconsider after 28 days or so, I still think it’s a decent price.
The extra money might also help Christina bang out more content, more quickly. She’s running the whole show herself, and this ain’t her full-time gig. “Currently I can only publish a new audio piece every 10 days due to very limited resources,” she writes. “With your support I would like to increase this frequency for you to every 3-4 days.”
There’s a countdown on Orgasmic Audio’s front page, so you always know when the next audio is dropping. As I type this up, I’m about 21 hours from the next release, a little something called Tinder Date in Latex Leggings. That sounds like it’s right up my alley, so I guess I’ll be back tomorrow.
If there’s one downside to the membership here, it’s just that the current collection is relatively small. Christina’s only been uploading audio for a few months now, and the current count stands at 14 erotic audio stories. That number includes tomorrow’s release but not the Introduction, and will likely be higher by the time you read this.
Membership has advantages besides just full access to the audio content. Christina is actively seeking feedback from her fans to incorporate into future work, and you can also vote on the next piece she releases. Honestly, I want to hear all of her proposed OrgasmicAudio. Just check out those titles! I can’t wait to hear Sister’s Best Friend Shows You How To Fuck, MILF Caught You Masturbating, and Oversee The Girls Party In Your House.
Tuned In and Turned On to Orgasmic Audio
After poking around OrgasmicAudio for a while, it was time to begin my official fap test. I was a little bit torn between The Sleepover, Meeting The Nymph and the two-part Edging Queen, but I figured I could always come back for another fap while I’m not on the clock. For this professional masturbatory endeavor, I chose a 16-minute fantasy story called The Sex Demon.
I had my choice between the full version and a shortened version with a couple minutes removed, but I wanted the full experience. Transcripts are also provided, but I didn’t want to spoil the story by looking at it. I put on my Meze 99 Classics and hit the Play button.
OrgasmicAudio is recorded in high-quality, immersive stereo, and the story opens with a rushing sound effect panning from side to side we hear Christina’s sexy voice. “Welcome to OrgasmicAudio.com!” After the intro, she told me to take off my clothes and listen to her. “I don’t want your skin to be covered by any fabric because I want it all to myself. I want to enchant you, to access your deepest desires, and make you sputter and quiver harder than ever before,” she said with a giggle.
The temperature heats up quickly. I was expecting a narrative about a sex demon, but it’s a lot more intimate than that. In this one, Christina speaks directly to the listener, guiding, instructing and teasing me along. “Right now, I just want to listen to your breathing until you fully calm down.”
In this story, I’m in bed, trying to relax and fall asleep when a mysterious wind blows in. There’s some supernatural spookiness in the setup, and then a mysterious, voluptuous, naked woman appears outside in the moonlight. “You look as confused as any man I’ve met before you, but the twinkle in your eyes tells me you’re going to be a lot of fun!” I don’t want to spoil what happens next, but I can assure you it’s not something you can talk about at work tomorrow. Well, not unless you’re a professional masturbator like me.
OrgasmicAudio.com is easily worth a peek if you’re into erotic stories and pornographic audio. While the collection is relatively small, you can tell Christina has crafted each piece with the care and passion of someone who enjoys the content just as much as her fans. This ain’t a cash grab but a labor of love, and the high quality of the content reflects that. There are plenty of free samples to see what Christina’s voice, words and ideas do for you, so I’d recommend starting there. If you like what you hear, memberships are cheap.