My readers didn’t just start masturbating last week. They have been at it for years and years and, in that time, have developed a rigid routine. Every man is a master of his own penis. We know precisely how our cocks want to be stroked. Pussy is excellent and all, but it can never match the skill with which your own dominant hand handles your manhood.
Because our skills become so honed, we as men can often forget masturbation doesn’t always have to be the same. Several things can be altered to bring new and fresh energy to your stroke game. You don’t have to get super complicated or buy your hand dinner first. Sometimes something as simple as changing hands can add a whole new dimension to your self-pleasure.
Dick Tip Tips
I’m always surprised when I drop this first tip to men, and they look at me with shock and awe. It’s so simple but can completely change the game. Use both hands, dumbasses. You have two for a reason. I understand some of your hesitancy. You think masturbation is like baking. One hand gets dirty in the dough, and the other stays clean to use tools like a spatula or the computer mouse.
Mouses can be cleaned, trackpads can be wiped, but masturbation is forever. You can deal with the consequences of your actions later. Right now, the only thing you need to concern yourself with is extracting as much pleasure from this cum as possible. With that goal in mind, get the second hand in the game.
One excellent use of the second hand is tugging on and playing with your balls. Of course, your balls want attention, too, so don’t leave them out of the fun. I also combine it with my dominant hand and double-stroke my shaft. It’s fucking fantastic. It’s as close to going balls deep as you will ever get on your own.
And while you’re getting your other hand in the mix, you might as well change up positions. When men start masturbating, body position is an afterthought. You’re more concerned with not getting busted while busting a nut than you are with sitting comfortably. Hopefully, that’s less of a concern now, and you can focus on yourself instead of your mom bursting in. Personally, I like to lean back and put my feet up like I was giving birth. I’ve been in the market for a used gynecologist exam table for this exact reason. While a combination of two folding chairs and a Papasan does the trick, a gyno table would be pure perfection.
This next tip is important because it can affect your sexual performance with partners. Not that any of my readers have sexual partners, but I’ll bring it up on the off chance you do. The fact men start masturbating in their mom’s house has reverberating effects throughout the rest of our lives. One of those scars is that many men masturbate with great haste. And, of course, that makes sense when your mom could burst in at any moment, but you’re an adult now and can take the time to do it right.
Taking that time increases your pleasure and helps you build stamina. Your penis is a dumbass. If it takes you thirty seconds to beat off your penis, it will do the same thing when it’s time to fuck a real vagina. You have to start the training now if you ever want him to last a full minute.
All this talk about masturbation has me hard as a fucking lead-wrapped granite boulder. It’s time to find some proper content for a wank. As you guys know, one of my favorite things to jerk off to is ebony porn. There’s nothing like the chocolate skin of a sexy black bitch with a fat ass and perky tits. It makes me want to spray a load just thinking about it.
I know precisely when my passion for black pussy came to life. It was during Janet Jacksons Superbowl performance when Justin Timberlake pulled her titty out. As it sat there staring me deep in the eyes, I couldn’t help but be mesmerized by her elaborate nipple jewelry. After that, I was a changed man.
I lived on a diet of hip-hop music videos from then on out. Every day I would become hypnotized by thick twerking asses. I desperately wanted to feel a big ass grinding against my hard dick. I would have cum just dancing with one of these bitches.
Upon discovering how popular ebony porn was, I became a true addict. Now, I can’t live without my daily dose of dark ass. I’m likely to have a seizure or stroke if I dare miss a day. Black pussy withdrawal can lead to sudden illness and even death.
When I need to see the sexiest black bitches getting their pussies railed out, I visit iwank. These guys have a humungous selection of ebony sluts begging for cock to fill up their pink holes. Rarely have I seen so fine a collection. It’s like the library of Alexandria but with more anal sex. I suppose that was a Roman library, so perhaps only marginally more anal sex.
The website is kept extremely simple. For my readers, that’s perfect because you guys aren’t necessarily rocket surgeons. The main menu rides the top of the website and has the options Home, All new, All popular, A language selector, Search videos, Popular, Latest, All, Long, and a page counter.
As I said, I’m not the only guy with a passionate love for ebony content. Iwank has translated their site into nineteen different languages so that men everywhere could enjoy the glory that is the black female form.
Below the menu is a fat stack of thumbnails. This place is loaded to the brim with the sexiest black sluts. These ladies have bodies sent down from heaven. Do you love big tits? They have them. How about fat jiggly asses? They have those too. I know you love voluptuous dick-sucking lips, and they are raining down from the sky on iwank.
These bitches are willing to do anything. Every orifice is up for grabs; every perverted sex act is on the table. Whatever it takes to make you spill your seed, these cunts can and will do. I know my readers can get a bit extreme at times, and you can let your freak flag fly on iwank.
Once you find the perfect piece of content for you, you can give it a click. One of the intelligent ways iwank optimizes its website is by not hosting content itself. All thumbnails are a link to the site that initially hosts the content. This takes a lot of the pressure off iwank, leaving them free to focus on finding the best new content. Think about all the maintenance and upkeep costs they save. You get to reap the benefits by having access to the best of the best.
These guys carry videos from all the best porn sites. You can find shit from Team Skeet, Xhamster, We Fuck Black Sluts, Jeffs Model, Naughty America, and Blacked. No matter where the content is coming from, you can know it’s the cream of the crop.
Dump Truck Asses and Wild Boar Cocks
Many of my readers are tranny fans, and you can find plenty of them here. Not only do these bitches have fat asses, bouncy titties, and dick-sucking lips, but they also have immense hard cocks. Cocks that dwarf your own. Dicks that make you feel bad for calling yourself a man. If you’re a man, what the fuck are these hog-cocked specimens?
I can never get enough sexy ebony pussy. Day in and day out, I return to the fountain to get another sip. No other women compare to the perfect bodies ebony sluts are blessed with. No matter what female body parts you favor, they have the idealized version.
Speaking of idealized, iwank is the ideal porn website. They keep the design as simple as can be. My readers are the better half of retarded, but even they find using it easy. The selection of content is enormous. So no matter how much black porn you watch, the well will never run dry. Your balls just won’t be able to keep up.
As much as I love both the site and the content, there’s still room to make iwank an even better website. While I love the simplicity, they could maintain it while adding further detail to the search filters. I want to filter for shit like big asses, balls deep, and cum shot. Is that too much to ask?
Iwank has everything you need to turn your next beat-off session into an epic ebony adventure.